Thank you Meg...you're a sweetheart.
And I know I said I was gonna take a break from here, but I need to get this all out in the open. I'm hoping that by doing this, I'll feel a little better.
I'm sure I've mentioned the situation with my best friend's father before. Anyway, he was diagnosed with lung cancer at the beginning of this year. Since then it has spread through his bones and now it's in his brain. He had to be sent to hospice this past Friday because he was throwing up blood. This all started happening right when I arrived at their house. Ever since he's had this ****, he's been in so much pain. I can't stand to see him like that. He's such a good man..and he stepped up when my father died and helped keep me in line. I've lost my biological father almost eleven years ago..I'm not ready to lose my "adopted" father.
I went to visit him Saturday and he looked so peaceful. The part that scares me the most is the fact that the doctors said it's coming down to the end now. They gave him the morphine pump, so when he starts feeling pain..he can just press a little button and he'll receive the morphine through his IV.
It was hard..sitting next to him, holding his hand, and watching him. I just sat there...rubbing his hand, and for the first time ever I told him I loved him. And that I appreciated everything he did for me. He didn't have to any of that...I know it was hard for him. I didn't exactly make it easy..
Okay, that's enough for now...I've done made myself get upset again. I just needed to put my thoughts somewhere..love you guys. We'll talk again soon...