If you were an Uber recruiter, what would be the first question you'd ask to Marco Rubio during the town hall he's never going to hold? I'd ask him if he ever gained any altitude with those wing-for-ears he's got there. I mean, he's handsome and all... but the ears are a distraction, don't you think?
So there's this boy I've been looking at every week on my tv. I like him a lot. His name is Jaime. He's cute and handsome and funny. He's really into his sister and sometimes he pushes children out of castle windows, but on the upside he has a really symmetrical face so those other things aren't deal breakers for me. How do I get Jaime to finally notice me?
FINE. IF YOU'RE GONNA BRING IT, I'M GONNA BRING IT TOO.
You're dropped into a volcano by a giant seagull. Like, Wun Wun in Game of Thrones but in seagull form. He has charged you with finding Hell. How do you dig deeper into the volcano to get there, and what does Donald Trump say to you when you finally make it to the fire and brimstony gates?